FOR THE LOVE OF A MAN

For the love of a man

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

…A wife I had been for fourteen years, a mother for thirteen; but a woman, I became at the ripe old age of thirty-five! I did not know that the body could give so much pleasure. Never had the flesh been loved and pampered so. Like a new convert, I went overboard and gave myself up to sheer sensuality. Morality and reason were banished from the happy space of hedonism where I lived for physical gratification.

The year passed in a sexual haze—sexual awakenings and raptures, rages and jealousies. There were ecstasies beyond belief, and agonies beyond endurance. Passion took hold of me like a virulent virus and in the rigours of this fever, I convulsed. To think I could have lived and died without experiencing such bliss

The Ultimate

The soaring of happiness,

Like powerful winged birds,

A cataract of pleasure

Cascading over flesh.

The agonised clamouring,

The striving, the straining,

The exquisite torture,

The tormenting clasp;

Grim determined pursuit,

As if battling for life.

Like two wild animals

In lethal combat.

Reaching for the intangible

Tantalizingly out of reach.

Faces curiously contorted

As if in pain,

The building of pressures

The rapturous convulsions.

The languorous stupor

The gratification intense,

A bounty greater than this

Can Nature bestow?

Raju patiently untangled the web of my inhibitions. Like water hyacinths, they had clogged the pool of my sexuality, making ripples of any sort impossible. He was the founder, propagator and follower of the cult of the cunt. If my eyes and mouth had drawn him to me initially, it was this part of my anatomy that kept him riveted by my side. According to him, it was something to live for, and die for! It was not an idle boast for he did get occasions to stake his life for me. He had never seen anything quite like it before. I dared not ask how many he had seen to make comparisons. As a gynaecologist, fingering women’s vaginas was a part of my job. Till now, I viewed the female sexual organs clinically—as a passage for procreation, rather than recreation. I even thought of the private parts in medical terms. It never occurred to me to observe them for beauty or to compare them with mine. I hated Raju for putting such ideas in my mind.

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